Please Read The Disclaimer First...

Originally posted 12/08/2007 on MySpace:

DISCLAIMER (please be sure to read this before continuing on to the rest of my blog, thanks!): I really need to preface this blog with the fact that I respect all religions and all people in general. However, this particular blog may offend some Christians or even members of other institutionalized religions. If it does offend you, I feel the need to apologize up front. No disrespect is intended. If you feel that you can't read the following with an objective and open mind I would encourage you not to proceed past this paragraph. What follows is mostly, if not all, composed of my own personal opinion, and I hope you realize that I am not forcing my opinion on you nor attempting to persuade you from your own opinion. I also wish to convey that I do not know everything about Christianity and am sorry if my perception is very different than reality. My experiences throughout this day have inspired me to share this opinion of mine. If you happen to continue reading and disagree with anything I say, I really would like for you to post your own opinion here. Everyone who provides valuable forms of feedback (that would be without name-calling or just out right dismissing anyone's opinion) will be free to post their opinion and are encouraged to do so. Everyone can have their opinion expressed if they feel the need. If you do proceed, I hope this blog will make you question everything in it and that which you know even if it only strengthens your conflicting opinion. Thank you.

Today I had an extremely interesting and very thought provoking experience. I had the great opportunity to make a journey to the North end of Colorado Springs to the New Life Church in order to watch their spectacular Christmas show entitled "Wonderland". This was an experience that I won't soon forget. The evening really made me contemplate on life and religion in particular and there are several points I feel the need to make.

First, as many of you probably know (and if you don't you can read more about it on Wikipedia or several other places on the web) New Life Church has had some turmoil over the past year. It was really strange as I was sitting in the large auditorium surrounded by so many people that could just cast aside particular groups of people. Of course Mr. Haggard made some mistakes, especially in the way he handled the situation, but who hasn't made mistakes? Why was he not deserving of understanding and forgiveness? Just because he had homosexual relations? Or was it because he hid them and accused other homosexuals of immorality? What gave the church the right to ruin this man's life? That is one of my biggest confusions with religion, especially Christianity. So much judgment is cast upon "sinful" people. My personal opinion is that all people, whether gay, African American, Jewish, Muslim, Mexican, or whatever else, are equally capable of good. Please don't get me wrong I am not saying that Christians are racist and I am also not generalizing. Some Christians are great, honest, courteous people, but others are too quick to judge. Just because another human being is of a different religious persuasion or happens to be gay doesn't automatically mean they are going straight to Hell, if such a place even exists. How is not accepting Christ as God's son a sin? How do any of these things make you any less than anyone else? It is very perplexing to me. It is also very perplexing to me to understand how Mr. Haggart's counselors "cured" him of his apparent homosexuality, making him "completely heterosexual".

As is probably clear by this point, I do not consider myself a religious person, yet I consider myself (I hope this doesn't sound too terribly conceded) to be a person of good morals. So why do I live with this respect for myself and others? It is not because some man or possibly (but not very likely) a woman stood behind a podium and told me that's the way it should be and that it is the only way I will get into Heaven. It is because I believe it is the right thing to do and will make my life better. It is not because I want to be rewarded in the afterlife, but because I want to feel rewarded in my own life here on Earth. I do not believe living your life for the favor of God or Jesus, but instead I believe in living your life for yourself. Christians are big on the fact that humans are naturally flawed and sinful and need to allow Christ into their hearts in order to be freed from this sin. I do not buy into that at all. I think humans are wonderful things, each just as capable of good as the next without the urging of religion to be that way. This can be argued against by discussing the evil in the world, but every person who kills, robs, rapes, insults, drives drunk, etcetera has the potential to be better than that. They make choices that lead to those activities. Some have mental issues that contribute to such behaviors, and that if the correct help was sought out, they could be properly treated before such activities occur. If some people see God and Jesus as ways to ensure living a good "sinless" life then that's great! More power to them! But don't use those same ideals to declare others "hopeless sinners". If I am kind, respectful, trustworthy, etcetera, then I feel better about myself, not because I feel that I will fall into favor with God, but because it makes me feel great.

Speaking of the afterlife, most religious folks find great comfort in the fact that there is something beyond this life. I have come face-to-face with death this year and my mom's passing was one of the toughest things I have ever experienced. Many people attempted to comfort me by telling me what an amazing wonderful person that she was and that there's no doubt she is in heaven watching over you. That could be a nice thought for some people, but I can't deal with that. My mom is still with me, but in memory and in who I have become. She will always be a part of me. I do not, however, believe in an afterlife. The thought of death scares me. It scares me a lot, but the thought of eternal bliss in Heaven or eternal damnation in Hell are not comforting. Life is life. Make the most of it. Enjoy yourself. Do good for others because it makes you feel good about yourself, not because you will get into Heaven. If Christianity is right and I end up in horrible torture in Hell after I die, then I might regret these opinions, but that is a choice I have made and will live with the consequences. I know I have led so far and will continue lead a good life and that is good enough to make me happy.

That's what I have to say. There may be more later, but I'm sure I have offended enough people for now… That and its starting to get late and I've had a very physically and emotionally draining day. So I must go, but before I do let me finish with this: Please let me know what you think. Whether you agree or disagree I want to know what you think! Thank you all, you are great people and great friends!